One Size Does Not Fit All

Ethan came downstairs in his gray pants with the orange stripes today. And I didn’t have the heart to tell him that his pants are a little too short. They are his favorite.

Then Gibson came down in a pair of brown pants and was tripping over them. They are just a little bit too long.

As I looked at my boys, my sweet, comical boys, I was struck with how they are at the same time out growing their clothes and growing into them. When it comes to growing boys, my job of finding clothes that fit them never ends.

This makes sense to us. We can look at physical changes and see that different sizes are needed based on how tall they are and whether or not they are skinny or thick.

But when it comes to finding our fit- finding our purpose in life– we have a tendency to look at what others are wearing. And we want what they have. If it looks good on them, why doesn’t it look good on us?

My boys can’t wear the same clothes, because they are 4 years apart and they have different shapes and builds.

Likewise, finding our purpose will not come from looking at someone else and their successes or failures. We are all built differently. Our passions, our abilities, our talents and our skills are unique to us.

Sometimes, I feel like we are all trying to fit into the same mold. We see someone else succeed and then we think that we have to follow the same path.

I wonder if we are losing some of the beauty of our diversity by trying to all wear the same clothes. And I want to shout, “One size does not fit all!!”.

For a long time, I felt guilty for not having figured out that one thing I wanted to be when I grew up. All I knew was that I wanted to serve God with my life, but when I told people that, I could see the skepticism in their eyes. And sometimes, they would even say it. That’s not enough, Becky! You need to have a career! And then they would try to figure out if I fit into the teacher or nurse or businesswoman mold.

It took me a long time to get over that guilt and to find my size. But now I realize that finding my purpose in life is not about a one size fits all and it’s not even about finding one thing that fits for the rest of eternity.

I might have a favorite passion for a season. But then I outgrow it. And that is okay!

Passions and purpose are ever-evolving. If you had told me five years ago that I would be a writer, I would have laughed. Yet here I am. If you had told me that I would love taking pictures and recording memories, I would have said, have you met my friend, Carolyn or my sister, Janey? They are the photographers and memory keepers. But now, leaving a legacy through my pictures and words is my favorite pursuit.

Can I say something that might be slightly unpopular?
Don’t try to fit into anyone else’s purpose. And stop trying to get others to fit into yours!

Maybe your friend loves playing Candy Crush. And another one throws Pinterest parties. Maybe you have a friend who reads theology books, but doesn’t have time to read your blog. Perhaps you are pursuing a master’s degree and homeschooling your kids is out of the question. Maybe you want to pursue your passions, but you could care less about the business end of things.

Oh, we are all so different! And whether others look at us and see pants that are too long or too short is not the point.

The important thing is are we seeking the size that fits us?